what hurt more than the rape

on attachment trauma, sexual violence and cptsd.

When I was younger, I used to fantasise about someone hurting me.

I would imagine the ambulance.
The police.
The hospital bed.
I would imagine my parents crying, holding me, finally looking at me.

My friends would write Facebook statuses about how much they adored me,
and how much of a loss it was that I was dead.

Years later, the catastrophe came.
The rape.

I w…